i think i was too rude today.
saturdays never change, they never ever change.

'hello, you're so pretty, who are you?' he asked, 'please play with me.'

somewhere at the back of my head, there are images of aching backs, forced laughter, green fields, pastelcoloured skies, balloons and children with melted icecream.

i look at my hands and think of wierd things.
like, what sort of things can this hands do now, and what would happen in the future.
and where/when will they ever belong.

i can tell her proudly, 'oh, ive learnt the secret song!'
like she would really care.

ive stared at the screen for a whole 15 minutes.
i have a million things going through my head, and there's no way i could type them down, because they just come and go.

i just feel like my life had not begin.
like, it had been so long since i felt alive.